Below are the 20 most recent journal entries recorded in Trish's LiveJournal:

Monday, May 21st, 2007
2:56 pm	tits n' whiskey "Fast cars and explosions Party hats and motion lotion Let’s go down to the ocean And break out the tits and whiskey" Current Mood: jumpy Current Music: mary prankster --->Let's Dance<---
Thursday, June 29th, 2006
6:30 pm	This is me unconscious. Current Mood: FUCKED. RAW. Current Music: hissing snakes and some wise ass's boots clomping away --->3 s shook the earth and sky Let's Dance<---
Wednesday, May 17th, 2006
10:18 am	Paint your face Dear "Reality", Out of the alleys, washing la gente off. Momma gave me a hug and sent me on my way. I'm leaving for the jungle on business on boundary check on boundary growth and I'm not coming back till I find the other Lion. (as a pelt or otherwise) Take care. Do everything I wouldn't, and maybe some stuff I would. Hairily mine, The Broad Current Mood: off to see the wizard Current Music: jesus built my hotrod --->31 s shook the earth and sky Let's Dance<---
Saturday, November 12th, 2005
5:13 pm	and now we're all shocked and speechless because the body is rejecting the virus and we don't have a cure for ourselves. Current Mood: upset Current Music: some foreign language and wild gesturing --->Let's Dance<---
Wednesday, October 26th, 2005
5:42 pm	My hair's falling out...what the fuck? Current Mood: packing a runaway lunch Current Music: we be burnin- sean paul --->Let's Dance<---
Thursday, October 20th, 2005
7:34 pm	a key a key a map a key I stood before the altar bowed and resigned I handed in my letter of resignation in the form of a scourge because I am no longer equiped or able to determine what is "right" and what is "wrong". that was my armor. and it chafed. and now its over. Current Mood: tired --->1 shook the earth and sky Let's Dance<---
Monday, October 10th, 2005
6:50 pm	Thats Grand Father for you. Current Mood: vaguely annoyed Current Music: perpetual- vnv nation --->Let's Dance<---
4:07 am	i'm going to take a nap now. if anyone is looking for me, try the bed. signed, Milf Current Mood: sleepy --->2 s shook the earth and sky Let's Dance<---
Tuesday, August 16th, 2005
7:53 am	Hi there. How are you? Current Mood: 8ish Current Music: my salvation-stromkern/anima mundi soundtrack --->1 shook the earth and sky Let's Dance<---
Thursday, July 28th, 2005
9:55 pm	you would think that i'm in control here. its very much the opposite. without his balance,or inhibiting nature, i'd have aired out the truths and ripped them both where they stood. all devil may care, who gives a shit if it becomes vindictive and the world hates us all the more for it, (sure emily would have cried in the outcome, but even tears will dry). i would have done it. i wanted to. goddammit. the boy is trying my nerves! i'd have clocked em. hard. i'd have scored them for making such a mockery! i'm still young enough to be arrogant goddammit! and ethereal enough to maintain it for longer than most! and by jov i'm just a trap waiting to be sprung now. i don't care how long i have to wait. i don't care how distant this grudge becomes. i will hold it until the debt be paid in full and not a second sooner. Current Mood: tense Current Music: urban monkey warfare- kmfdm --->Let's Dance<---
Tuesday, May 24th, 2005
5:30 pm	WHOOO BOY! I AM BACK! spring cleaning's a bitch! i would definately compare rentry like being drunk. the glass of water kind. and even if its not 'foreign' there is never a way to prepare yourself fully enough. fire is always fire and flesh will always burn. so yea, i have a grocery list. and because i'm gimpy the one winged wonder who couldn't fly if her life depended on it, i'm in no position to offer advice except to use my own keys to look for well thought out answers from those less clipped than I. Peanut butter goes well on everything if not make it incredibly better. Current Mood: HUNGRY! Current Music: the rebel's mix- a violet bootleg --->Let's Dance<---
Tuesday, December 21st, 2004
10:58 am	I can't find my Cibo Matto cd There is no such thing as a "friendly" conversation with Joshua anymore and that scares me. In lieu of the events of last night, I ran to go find him drinking ridiculous amounts of alcohol again. I wish I could say that this happens infrequently but these days he's either drunk,hungover or passed out. Its nothing short of desperate. he was sitting at a table, chin buried in his arm holding close this huge bottle of jack and gave me the deadest look i've ever seen on him, it was terrible....I never want to see this look on him again, it reminded me very much, nay, TOO much of my old best friend Tristan, he and I worked down at the docks many a year ago but had a mother who was never quite right (which consequently was passed down to him). Walking in on her hanging from the ceiling killed him a hundred times over until syphillis drove him crazy and died. Ah memories. Call it a hunch, but i grabbed him firmly by the wrist and dragged his long white buttoned sleeve up to the elbow. One deep laceration and all he could do was groan that i had popped the buttons off his good shirt. yea, one of a hundred identical "good" shirts. I could have cried. Shit. Little wonder. "Joshua, why?" "Why not?" "Why not care?" "Who's looking?" "what does that have to do with anything?" "its not real unless someone is looking" "of course its real, its your fucking body Josh" " *quote fingers* 'body' " "we have a responsibility for what we are" "and yet we don't exist unless someone sees us" "thats not true josh" "oh, then please, enlighten the class Tripoli, don't save all this fucking wisdom for yourself, tell us, what happens when we walk offstage? I certainly don't go to my dressing room and fuck groupies." "What do you want?" "What does it matter?" "Why are you being so unreasonable?" "Why are you asking all the wrong questions?" "What am i not asking?" "nevermind" "no, Joshua, not nevermind, why have you been hurting yourself?" "I was hoping to follow in the glorious footsteps of my mother, i don't know, what the hell kind of question is that?" "then what kind of questions should i be asking you josh?" (he's yelling now) "oh, here's one, 'why the fuck do you care tripp?'" (and now i'm yelling too)"Why won't you let anyone in????!!!" the lines get blurrier around this point, i can't remember much afterwards because i start crying. a battle for the bottle ensues. it breaks. and then we're both crying. I'm so depressed I can hardly get out of bed today. Too much pain and too little energy to spare for comforting your friends. stretched thin. Current Mood: quietly crying Current Music: sigur ross --->Let's Dance<---
Monday, December 6th, 2004
1:26 pm	Something feels amiss. Current Mood: concerned Current Music: Round Midnight- Thelonius Monk --->Let's Dance<---
Tuesday, November 23rd, 2004
11:44 pm	Tonight was a night of drunk reflection. V.D. n' I were sitting back on what some have come to claim as hallowed ground known as "the playstation couch" which in actuality is a big musty brown courdouroy three seater with rips, holes, beer stains and smart ass bits of paper that say "What did you expect to find in the couch? signed- the couch" wedged between the pillows. We had pushed it to face a window and kicked our feet up on the coffee table slowly nursing our drinks. For me a Killian's and for her a bottle of Absolut. The sky was a dark inky blue, but brilliantly illuminated with a million tiny diamonds flickering billions of miles away. I gazed out, loosing myself there and told her what happened back at the apartment in Brian in all its gory detail. Officials there wouldn't have batted an eyelash at the scene had they saw it, probably wouldn't have even come to check on us if we were complained about. But it didn't matter what THEY thought. That life, and that vivacious and vicious city was behind me now. I felt pretty over it, despite its gruesome truth but the guilt and residue nagged me. It felt incomplete. Then VD said something really smart, or at least, sounded really smart whilst trashed- "Why not remember this? why forget it? boil it down, concentrate it into self contained steel and nickel or ink and needle and put it into something small?" So we heated a needle and pierced my eyebrow. "Concentrate everything into this ball bearing...nothing should go forgotten, nor burdened in memory, but acknowledged and honored. *thrust-squish*" It makes alot of sense, and I've come to peace with the bits come undone within me for now. Its reassuring to know that I'm not the only one who care about where my ass hits the floor. Current Mood: pleased Current Music: zero7-destiny --->8 s shook the earth and sky Let's Dance<---
Tuesday, November 16th, 2004
1:51 am	this ain't yo' mama's campin' trip. I think i need to move. Brian is not where I should be anymore. I need mountains. open space. less posessions. Current Mood: decisive Current Music: zero7 --->Let's Dance<---
Monday, November 15th, 2004
2:49 am	i can hardly see or read this screen. When I was younger, I'd have been proud of this. It would have been another grand accomplishment, testament to my strength and invincibility. a signature of my resilient arrogance. Born of an angel, therefore infalliable. Pride doesn't make the swelling go down. Current Mood: upset Current Music: interstate lovesong- stone temple pilots --->Let's Dance<---
Thursday, November 11th, 2004
2:00 am	I like my life. I do, I'm very fond of it. I have my tea, my ball of yarn, my sage burning softly on my bedside table, soup in my fridge, books on my shelves, and i will never have a tv, i have enough money to afford heat, and a stray kitty who i can spare milk for, i have fire in my furnace, and i feel fine. i love. thats what i do. Current Mood: content Current Music: coltrane --->Let's Dance<---
Monday, November 8th, 2004
12:48 am	I walked to the docks today. I stood at the end of the peer eating funnel cake and twisting off small morsels to feed to the seagulls. Their effort to fight for scraps awed me, it was meditative even just to watch them. The distillation of life is worth so little until you get down to something as little as seconds. precious seconds, spent devoted to a cause. There is an unspoken urgency in the use of seconds over minutes, hours, days, weeks, or months. Movement, the ebb and flow of life, felt very present as i sat and watched them dive for fried bread. everything contributing to survival. everything done as if their survival depended on it. it was beautiful. Current Mood: anxious Current Music: iggy pop- lust for life --->2 s shook the earth and sky Let's Dance<---
Wednesday, November 3rd, 2004
12:23 am	dancing and singing and singing and dancing. i can only fly in circles ok ok, so it didn't work. sometimes it doesn't. thats how "life" is. hell, if our little schemes worked all the time i doubt i'd be sweating having snuck a large metaphysical detox room between the bathroom and the kitchen under my landlord's nose. much less harboring a live wire. but sometimes, like now, one finds themself wiping their nose and cleaning the blood off the floor in the water closet and lamenting. sometimes there is guilt for having been created by and at the will of someone else and with the thought in mind of using you for their personal gain. and then again, sometimes, it isn't all that bad. there are bruises though. there have always been bruises. who the fuck cares? i don't. i don't need to. the tub is clean, so i don't need to care. i can carry satchels of great importance, easily greater than my own life. and whether its singing folk songs while i stock shit in the co-op, or sing seabound songs cleaning dishes the core problem still remains- i can't ever seem to realign my fucking nose. Current Mood: annoyed Current Music: seabound- beyond flatline album --->Let's Dance<---
Tuesday, October 26th, 2004
2:10 am	I am here. --->Let's Dance<---